


When you wake up

by chandlerinabox



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Canon Universe, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:15:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23568205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chandlerinabox/pseuds/chandlerinabox
Summary: He hopes to show him the beauty that he sees...A very short drabble of Armin's thoughts as him and an unconscious Jean are left to survive on their own in the grips of Wall Maria.
Relationships: Armin Arlert/Jean Kirstein
Comments: 4
Kudos: 30





	When you wake up

Armin had always found sunsets to be beautiful. It was a gentle yet powerful reminder that there had to be something more out there. He wanted to reach out and grab whatever feeling stirred inside of him, feeling it everyday.

It’s this pull towards something greater than himself that pushes him to the brink of his life, whether by following Eren and Mikasa after the collapse of Wall Maria or by joining the survey corps. Death always seemed to be waiting around the corner. But he’s not reckless, at least he tries not to be, however, Eren made this difficult. But he had found comrades along the way, some he would even call special in his heart. When he was not thinking of the next move for the lives of the survey corps, he would close his eyes and be taken back to that mess hall with the original trainees, before over half of them would lose their lives. That time was gone now, too. 

He wondered if Annie stirred from her slumber in that crystal, or where he had put that straw hat that his grandfather gave him. It had been missing for months. Of course, it was not the hat itself that he missed, it was the idea that he once had a loving family member, even though it had only been Grandfather and himself for some time before Eren and Mikasa became his new family, as young as they were. 

It was this idea of great loss that pricked at Armin’s skin as he rode through the fields of Maria again and again. 

It struck him again very heavily on his ribcage as Jean, the dear friend that he had become, refused to rouse from his position on top of him. One heartbeat later, and he found there was no one else around. Armin pushed Jean forward and off of his chest, so he could sit up. Neither of them could continue the mission. Both of their horses had ran away.

With no other idea in his head, he leaned Jean’s back onto his chest, grasping at his shoulders. There was no need to panic. They were in a field of trees. There were no sounds of titans around them, at least not in the general area-for now. Jean had yet to open his eyes, but his breathing became very heavy. Armin, like he often did, went back to his first meeting with the taller man. It had been with Eren, actually, back in that lunch hall. Even then, Armin thought Jean had a striking aura, clearly intelligent, but Eren’s personality often brought out the provoking side of people. There had been something that had wanted to reach out to him, to speak to that part of Jean that was hidden away. He remembered the look upon his face when Marco had gruesomely passed away. 

The taller soldier twitched in his arms. Armin looked down upon him, inspecting his face, but his eyes remained closed. From this angle, Armin could see the dip in his nose, the slant of his lips, the light freckles on his face, the kind you could only see if you looked close. It was hard to look away. 

But how long had it been? How much time had passed? Armin knew they had to get moving. Reinforcements would be at least two fields away. With no horse around, he looked up to the trees above as a potential shelter. However, an unconscious Jean would make that move very difficult. He would have to try. 

The soldier gave a deep sigh. Armin immediately looked down at the man in his arms to find his eyes open and staring wide at his own. He opened his mouth, and for a minute, they shared the same air, sweat dripping down Armin’s face. They said nothing and his eyes slowly closed once more. Armin, breathless, moved him slightly for some kind of activity from the taller soldier, but none came. He felt something reach in and squeeze his heart, then his lungs, and he felt the earth fall away from underneath his body. He reached for Jean’s face, slowly brushing his thumb down his cheek. There was no mind or madness. It was just how it happened. He felt the same rush as he had every night, watching the sunsets in their beauty. He whipped his head up at the sudden feeling of heart-pounding dizziness. 

No, now was not the time for...this. Not now. He got to his knees with one arm holding Jean up on his back, the other running down his forehead to his cheek, then to his neck. He could feel the pulse beating under that hot flesh, burning his fingertips as he inhaled sharply. No, this was not a new realization, this had always been there. Of course it had. He quickly pulled his hand away, because at least he knew that the man was still alive.

Armin stretched his neck to peer around. The field was deserted. He had failed to come up with a plan this time, the trees around him feeling far away. He did not know the time anymore. He struggled to breathe as the anxiety rose and fell in his veins. Everything had changed before, and it was just about to change once more.

In the distance, a great figure rose into the field of view, and Armin knew it was time. He put this aside, put away everything, only gripping the sword tight in his fist as he prepared to get onto his feet, holding Jean as he lay down in the grass. As the titan ran closer, Armin took one last look at the soldier in the field, his chest rising and falling slowly. He felt the strings of heart play once more, hoping he would survive to see that ocean near twilight. Eren and Mikasa would be with him too, in all of their glory, perhaps with the group of trainees he had grown to fit in his heart as well. He would bring Jean too, and show him the glow of the sunset, telling him just how watching the beauty of it makes him warmer than he’s ever felt and how Jean makes him feel the same.

**Author's Note:**

> It has been a while since I've written anything at all, so this is a small warm-up piece for me.  
> Hope you are all well :)


End file.
